Does RIE Exist After Age Two?
By Roseann Murphy
Many people wonder if RIE exists after the age of two. It always makes me wonder why. Perhaps it is because of the perception that Magda Gerber's training is specifically directed towards children under the age of two, when in fact it is a timeless philosophy, a methodology that can be used throughout life. The longer I have studied Magda's work, the more evident this truth has become.
Authenticity, honesty, consistency, and respect—these are all words to live by, whether you are dealing with your six-year-old, your teenager, your spouse, or your co-worker. Everyone wishes they could be treated in the respectful RIE philosophy.
My first introduction to Magda Gerber and RIE was in the late 1970’s; Resources for Infant Educarers was a concept Magda introduced while teaching at Pacific Oaks college, Pasedena, California. Her teaching methods certainly exemplified the philosophy. This is why it is so intriguing to listen to her speak. This is why, when I heard her speak, I longed for more. It was not about age. The RIE philosophy can benefit anyone at any stage of life and it is timeless.
Magda's work is not about high chairs and pacifiers. It is not about sitting down to eat or not playing with your infant. It is not about allowing your child to make the rules in your house. It is about life and guidelines. It is about resurfacing as parents, parents who use their intellect and their intuition. It is about waiting and resisting the urge to enter every class and push children beyond their limits. RIE is about patience and relaxation and trusting yourself and your child.
I am amazed at how often adults today relinquish their position as parents, some out of fear their children won’t love them, some out of fear they will make the same mistakes their parents did. Many parents seem to have forgotten they are on this Earth to guide and show their children the way.
RIE definitely exists beyond age two. What five-year-old wouldn’t appreciate being taught what the boundaries are and then being left to their own resources to play? Which thirteen-year-olds wouldn’t appreciate being given the chance to stretch their wings, while knowing they have a safe place to land and that someone will say “no” when it’s necessary?
RIE is a foreign language in today’s society. Magda's work asks parents to allow children to grow and develop as they should, maturing slowly as flowers are allowed to do. Instead, our society dictates exactly the opposite: "Push them through the stages." "More is better." Television, video games, concerts, soccer, ballet, football, gymnastics (all adult-led activities). Even a teenager couldn’t keep up with all of this and yet we ask small children to survive so many activities.
On the other hand, Magda's work does not suggest sitting back and letting your children go wild. The work suggests thoughtful parenting should allow children to grow in their own time.
“Grow in your own time” does not mean to abandon all rights of adults while infants, toddlers, and teens are allowed to do whatever they please (in the name of growth and development). RIE suggests setting clear limits and allowing everyone’s needs to be met. It means letting go of the fear that if you, as the adult, use common sense and set guidelines, your child’s creativity will be forever stifled.
RIE must continue past age two. Magda's work is what every parent longs for. It means creating an environment that is slow-paced, with no schedules and no phones or screens, and enjoying those treasured moments when you and the children are allowed to “just be.”
Roseann Murphy is the Director of the Little River School, Malibu, California.
This is a revised edition, April, 2020.
The original edition was published in the Educaring magazine at the request of Magda Gerber in 1996.
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VOLUME 17, NO.4, Page 4 FALL, 1996
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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed on this blog are solely those of the original author and cited contributors, and do not represent the opinions of any other agency, resource, organization, company, or individual. Assumptions made in the analysis are not reflective of the position of any other than the original author or cited contributors.
This is fantastic! I am so looking forward to reading more of your work. As a student of ECE, it is a blessing to be able to learn from someone who has worked first-hand with the most celebrated practitioners in the field. Even more than that, you continue to grow and build on that knowledge; that lifelong drive is what I now strive for.
This article is every bit as appropriate as it was in 1996. The onslaught of stresses parents and children face every day is staggering and the issues affecting them are even more pronounced. Opening the door to Magda's work like this is sure to offer hope to those who need it most and you are just…
Roseanne, I remember we were working at Little River School when you were asked to write this piece. It did not take more than a few moments for you to write it and I’m sure it’s because with your knowledge and experience you are able to very clearly and concisely elaborate on this subject. I have seen you do so not just in writing, but also in informing parents.
What you have addressed stands the test of time and is a beautiful reinforcement and extension of Magda Gerbers’ legacy and RIE. I am also very proud to have learned first-hand many things from working closely together and it is truly impressive how your piece has stood the test of time.
Hello. This is Sinton. I worked for Magda and went through her certification. So many years ago. After I took her class at PO. One day we were driving her husband somewhere and we were all
In the car in front of her house. He insisted that the front door may not be locked... was it locked? She answered yes it was... but he could not trust that and went on to ask again and again... she very quietly said, Why don’t you check. He got out of the car to see. Meanwhile a frustrated look was on her face. But she respected his desire to check. She waited and he got back in the car. It Had b…