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Writer's pictureRoseann Murphy

Parenting on a Schedule: A Matter of Attention



The following article was originally posted on the Little River School blog by Roseann Murphy in collaboration with Magdalena Palencia, on March 8, 2012.


After a brief sabbatical, I have returned to the business of education and child development. I am currently working with three infant girls ranging in age from ten weeks to ten months. In addition, I am working with an eighteen-month-old boy who entered our program at ten weeks of age. His first care arrangement did not work out so little Cal’s adjustment required patience and open communication between home and here. These experiences bring back wonderful memories. I find myself picking up right where I left off a few years ago, spending my day observing infant behavior and allowing the optimal environment for eating, sleeping, and playing.


In  October 1982 Madga Gerber of Resources for Infant Educarer fame was interviewed by The New Age Source News Publication.  As always, Magda Gerber’s insight follows through all the years, fads, and philosophies.  We continue to hear the terms, “quality time or special time” especially in today’s technologically foggy world. Magda was asked what is helpful to the child when parents are so busy and time is so limited.  Magda responded: "What is it that is helpful to the child? What is it that enhances a child’s positive sense of themselves?" Pikler found that it is important for young children to interact consistently with one or two stable adults regardless of whether or not they are the parent. Bathing, dressing and being attentive for at least some period of time each day was found significant. (New Age Source, October 1982 page 3.)


The A Bilingual Childhood Education Blog by Magdalena S. Palencia March, 2012 article came at a most opportune time. Here, I am able to share this insightful article with current readers and participants in my program. “Parenting on a Schedule: A Matter of Attention,” has little to do with “schedules” as we might imagine. When we think of schedules we often attach the meaning of specific time…of minutes and hours.  Gerber and Magdalena S. Palencia seemed to transcend timelines and emphasize the need for attention to the child.


Magdalena’s article emphasizes as did Magda Gerber and Emmi Pikler, the need for consistency and for “full-on” attention when caring for your child.   As childcare professionals, Magdalena and I realized a caregiving situation was successful only if the parent had trust in the program and the carers. As Magdalena states, “If a child does not feel secure in a routine where their parents come and go on a consistent basis and where they are clearly communicated to on a level they can understand, and then they will express their confusion in different ways. Some will show changes in the way they play or eat and might have difficulty sleeping. In extreme cases, the child may cry, scream, or in some cases, grab the parent’s leg.”


For those of us in the field, it is very obvious when a parent is not secure in their choice of care. Their child can never relax.  They are always “waiting”.  When a parent innocently says, “Go ahead into school..When I return we will go to the park, get candy or go to the movies.” The message to the child reads, “This is just a place where you have to wait… until I return and then we will have fun.”  We have observed children unable to play, unable to rest…while they wait for that magical time. If the schedule changes during the course of the day and the parent is unable to fulfill the promise, the day is ruined for the child. In addition, time stands still.


An excellent example of respect, communication, and children being allowed to take the lead in play is apparent in the photos in the article. The wild card and the playhouse are the results of hours of uninterrupted play. In an optimal family or child care setting, a child is allowed to play freely during the day.


You can read the full article below; it touches on many important areas of parenting and childcare.  It is a pleasure to share it with you:


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